Are you doomed to chronic dissatisfaction also known as cognitive dissonance, the static that is created when your way of thinking and reality are at war? The mind races to resolve cognitive dissonance, which it achieves by means of changing beliefs or denial, or both.
Welcome to the hedonic treadmill where pleasure becomes ordinary so you seek more and more sensation and more and more luxuries to give the same payoff. When is enough, enough and how to distinguish between your needs and your wants? When was the last time you stopped to consider the ramifications of these never ending searches?
It’s not what you have but what you enjoy that constitutes abundance.
Pause for now and let’s frame this as a different type of search entirely; let’s call it a Soul Search. I recommend choosing a journal or notebook to record your responses. The connection with pen to paper is stronger than when keyboarding. Carve out solitary time for yourself. Consider the following questions, and as you do, write down whatever comes to mind. Big questions like these deserve your time and attention. They are not casually constructed inquiries, and are posed as an initial step to invite greater curiosity about yourself.
What are you passionate about?
What turns your energy on or off?
What are you truly attracted to?
What are your strongest held beliefs?
What will you DO about your beliefs?
The temptation is to overthink your responses. Some answers may be immediate and resonate deeply. Be honest with yourself. There’s no right or wrong, nor is there a score card anywhere. Even when making extreme comparisons, not everyone aspires to save the world or own a Ferrari. The goal of the exercise is to move towards deeper self-discovery that may range from profound discomfort to the perfect fit. Is it in alignment with who you are or who you strive to be personally and/or professionally?
So, what’s next? Once you identify something appealing to contemplate, is it doable? If not, what steps need to be taken to work towards bringing you closer to incorporating more of —- into your life? For some of us, adding what you want can become a priority or at closer examination, a truncated version of that. If extra revenue is necessary to fund your passion, how can you create that? If it’s additional time or connections, how can you squeeze minutes from a day to = precious hours in a week? With a plan in place and people who recognize and support your commitment you are on your way to a life richer in possibility.
Changing behaviors means identifying what’s not working and shift or replace that with a new behavior. However comfortable you assumed you were with choice and change, it may morph into overwhelming anxiety that was never anticipated. This makes it the ideal time to engage the support of a career coach with experience in helping professionals achieve better, faster, results. At KICKSTART Your Transition we offer a broad range of services to fit your needs.
©MWeisner2020